Updated: Feb 7, 2021
If you want to know love, to be love, or to be loved, you have to put in the time to understand yourself.
So many of us, me included feel an incredibly strong need to have a partner, to feel loved, to love another. It’s how we are wired, it’s a basic human need.
The thing that gets us in a mess is that we can become attracted to the idea of someone, to their highlight reel, to our deep desire to go through life with a loving partner by our sides.
And often in that pursuit, we haven’t done the work to know ourself first, to heal our pains and to love ourselves properly. We don’t even know what loving ourself means, we dismiss it as vanity or selfishness.
If you want to know love, you have to learn how to love yourself, to know who you are, and what drives you.
The longing to express love gets mixed up by expressing it to others first.
We’re great at self-deception, we seem to struggle to face our truth, and so we can end up living a life suppressing our heart's desire.
When we don’t have the capacity to express love to ourself first, we create suffering, for ourself and others.
The first step for you to take is to accept that the love you seek is inside your heart. You need to honour yourself.
I know you’ve heard this before, but have you actioned it, or fully understand it?
From what I have learned, the most ancient wisdom stands tall.
Get the inside right, the outside will fall into place.” Inside is where our love waits for us. Eckhart Tolle
I think we love the idea of getting love from something or someone outside, but it doesn’t work well that way. How can it? Love comes from your heart, love comes through your heart, love is the energy you feel when you have those rare moments of bliss. I think you know that deep down, but it seems too hard to love yourself fully, you were told how to be, who to be and what’s best for you based on other peoples well-meaning, but flawed belief systems built on fear.
I love my sons and I would kill for them; I actually believe I would! But for my sons to feel that, they have to feel their own heart, be awake and receptive to self-love. They have to be able open to love as it truly is, a heart centred connected ever-present state, that flows from me to them and back to me infinitely.
If I had low self-love for myself, I may wonder if I’m a good enough Mum, or I may play a role other than my true self afraid that I’m not enough. That’s not love, it’s fear and my sons would feel that.
I love them fearlessly, unbounded, not because I need them to love me, but because I am a source of fierce love and I share that with them, I put the time and effort into tuning into my heart, into clearing the mess my mind can create,
So, I repeat step into self-love if you want to feel love, loved and lovable.
If you want to know what love is, what it feels like, put in the time.
Activate love now.
Put your hand on your chest, close your eyes, take a deep breath and say, “thank you, thank you, thank you”.
Do it for 10 mins, you’ll feel different, you’ll feel a glimpse of your heart in its truest nature. Love.
Most people won’t even try this, don’t be most people.
Love begins with YOU.
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Love love love xxx